You Ran Away

Written on 10/14/2025

Inhale, Exhale,
Running away Again?
I thought you were someone…
Who didn’t run away….
I’m so disappointed in you, Princess….

Whenever I tried to speak to you,
About our battlefield conflicts
You would always run away
Our world has always been
An unhealthy battlefield
Both of us with our Perfect Masks

Ah, our True Colors Showed themselves
When we both took off our masks
Who were you really, Princess?
You were a dangerous, gentle Siren
Who ran away when a threat appeared
You couldn’t fight me head-on.

Who was I when I took off my mask?
An angry, scared little boy..
I needed to be my own shining knight
I needed to protect myself
From monsters like you
From cowards like you
Who would leave me to die in this wasteland.

Your Enneagram Type is called….
The peacemaker….
That’s funny, you know
You didn’t make any peace at all with me
You are a peacekeeper to yourself,
Only to yourself can you barely keep the peace

Our peace? In our world?
It was destroyed 2-3 years ago…
The moment you decided to abandon me
Our world was no longer peaceful
I didn’t break you; you broke me
I don’t care how much pain I caused you
You’re the one who broke me first, after all.

I needed to rely on you for survival, you know?
If I didn’t make you my pillar,
I would be long dead and consumed by the darkness
I knew that making you my pillar,
Was like intensively holding onto a thorned, gentle rose
I was in pain on a daily basis,
I hid all that pain and how broken I was
Behind a Perfect Little Mask
You could never see who I truly was
I never wanted you to see it anyways.

My former Princess might wonder why
If I allowed you to see behind my mask,
You would quickly leave and abandon me
Well, I got tired of holding up the mask
I threw the Mask Down
You got scared, shocked, and surprised
You so desperately wanted to abandon me
All to save yourself
What about me, then, Princess?
Did you think I could save myself?
Because I couldn’t.

You abandoned me.
You ran away from the battlefield
You left me to die
You didn’t care whether I was dead or alive
You hoped others would rescue me
What if others didn’t rescue me?
What if you were my only salvation?
Even if your salvation feels like,
I’m holding onto a blade to survive.

There is nothing more tragic,
Them being forced to see despairing events
With nothing you can do but
To suffer and to watch
I couldn’t let you go
Until I finally found my actual safe haven
You were a neglectful haven
That I had to rely on….
If I didn’t, I wouldn’t be breathing….